I’ve been hoarding pictures for you.
I think we look alike.
I’m all autopilot. I’m simply going through the motions. Okay, that’s not entirely true. Not at all, actually. I’m doing everything I can to immerse myself in these fleeting moments. So maybe I’m less on autopilot and more…just…in acceptance. When I never know what’s going to happen next, how long Sia’s going to sleep, when Kai’s… Okay, mostly just how long Sia’s going to sleep…it’s taught me more than ever to be here and now. When I finally get a second to spend some one on one time with Kai and a little golden book, I savor it. Not to mention, time to myself with a good book!
With a newborn around you truly never know what your day is going to look like. But there are a few things that I’ve found that keep me on this side of sane:
(In order of importance)
I’m talking down to washing the most important dishes first. When you have a free second, quickly assess what needs to be done and do the most important one first. Even if that means doing nothing. Sometimes the most important thing you need to do is rest.
2. Everything in its right place.
Get organized. This is where you’ll see that nesting instinct come in handy. Have a place for everything; pacifiers, diapers, wipes, nursing pads, bottles, swaddlers, burp cloths, baby meds. I basically have stations set up around my house. I keep some diapers and wipes, a paci, a burp cloth, and a bottle of water(for me) at each station.
3. Wear your baby.
There are days when they just want to be held. You can choose; lounge around with baby all day or put on a sling and do what you can with those free hands. You can’t go wrong either way.
4. Do what you need to/can to stay sane.
Play your favorite music, call a friend while your nursing(or rocking baby), watch a movie(if you can stand pausing it several times), read a book(again, while nursing or rocking baby). There’s actually a lot of downtime with new baby. Learn ways to utilize this.
5. Paper plates and plastic cutlery.
I know, I know, not the best for the environment. But we’re talking about your sanity here, and everyone knows “if mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”. Besides, we’re only talking a few weeks. Give yourself a break.
That’s what this is all about.
“I release attachment to the way things should be so I can welcome the way things are.”
Because I have been checked out…
During one of Sia’s 4am feedings, groggily checking my email, I stumble upon a notification from wordpress. The sweet lady over at oh my darlin baby has nominated me for a liebster award!! I’m thrilled and flattered, and it’s really just the push I need to start blogging again. By the way, the liebster award is really just a way for up and coming bloggers to connect-ones with less than 200 followers to be exact. There are no judges or real awards. It’s mostly a chain letter, just for fun. The “rules” ,if you will, are simply that you:
1. state 11 facts about yourself 2. answer 11 questions posted by he/she who nominated you 3. and submit 11 nominees with 11 questions to answer
My eleven answers to oh my darlin baby‘s questions:
1.What is your favorite song? Either Mouthful of Cavities by Blind Melon or 1979 by Smashing Pumpkins. Or maybe The Rain Song by Led Zeppelin. That’s a hard question.
2.Who is the most important person to you? Another toughie!! Right off hand, I want to say my children. My mom and dad. The father to my children.
3.Why do you blog? I blog because I want to connect with like-minded people. I want to help people feel that they are not alone.
4.Zombies or Vampires? Vampires, my bf practically is one;-)
5.How do you like your eggs? runny and on a sandwich or scrambled in bacon grease.mmmm.
6.Do you consider yourself fashionable? Why or why not? Nope, fashion has to do with the “current trends”. I guess i can draw inspiration from them, but also from anything else. A city, a movie, a mood, music…are all inspiring to me and can affect the way I dress on any given day.
7.What actor would play you in a movie of your life? Ellen Page or Michelle Williams or Aubrey Plaza
8.What would you like to accomplish before you die? These children of mine were really important as far as that goes. I also want to travel a lot (A LOT) more, and be an entrepreneur.
9.What beauty product can you not live without? chapstick
10.What is the most expensive thing in your wardrobe? Probably these shorts from Free People that Jes bought me for Mother’s Day…and then I cut a whole in them(right near the crotch) while I was sewing… Still pisses me off..
11.Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings? I am so ashamed to say that I’ve not read Lord of the Rings-yeah, yeah, you can close your mouth now..aaand wait for ittt..I’m just now reading Harry Potter. I’m on the fourth one and I cannot put them down. I want to live in Harry Potter land all the hours of my days.
eleven ten nominees:
(that’s only ten, and to be honest, I’m not sure they all have “less than 200 followers”)
Eleven facts about myself:
1.I collect pillowcases.
2.My favorite look is 90′s grunge.
3.I really, really want to live in Knoxville, Tennessee.
4.I am fascinated by the brain and the heart and how they affect our decisions and choices every day.
5.The best decisions I’ve ever made are when I throw caution to the wind, and let my heart lead.
6.From 18 to 22 I didn’t live anywhere for more than 6 months.
7.I don’t particularly like eighties music, but dancing to it is fun.
8.If I have to do something meticulous, I tend to count while I’m doing it..for some reason.
9.One of my goals for the summer is to learn to drive a tractor.
10.Jessee (the Papa to both my babies) and I are not married. We prefer it this way, for now.
11.We run a CSA business and it’s a dream come true.
And eleven questions for you folks:
1.What is your favorite book?
2.What do you think is most important in relationships?
3.How do you feel when you look at the night sky?
4.Are you better at putting your thoughts on paper or speaking them aloud?
5.Do you consider yourself introverted or extroverted?
6.What is your go-to when you are feeling overwhelmed or stressed?
7.What is your favorite season?
8.What was your favorite thing to do when you were 5 to 8 years old?
9.Beach or Mountains?
10.What do you struggle with most with blogging?
11.What would you consider to be your spirit-animal?
*be sure to let your nominees know you voted for them*
I’ve been a mess.
I like to stay on top of things, to not let things pile up and fester, to deal with them before they get out of control. I just find it’s easier that way-it works for me. So I’ve swept everyday, kept the kitchen sink empty(mostly), laundry put away, rugs crumb free, I’ve even reorganized my hospital bag more than once.
The thing is, none of this matters. I have no control over this. Not even mentally. Yeah, I can change my attitude, look around me and appreciate all that is now, watch funny movies to get my mind off of it, talk it out with loved ones. But none of this changes how pregnant I am, how uncomfortable I feel and most of all, how bad I want to meet and love on this little lady inside of me. I’m sure she’ll come when my house is the most messy and I’m the most unprepared. I’ve been around the block enough to know how these things work. And it won’t matter. I’ll still be ecstatic!
She is/will be a Pisces. She’s a water sign, a fish even. She may never come out of that warm watery goodness we call the womb!
I know, I know, I’ve still got three weeks before I’m even overdue. What can I say, patience is not my strong suit these days(if it ever was). And THAT DOES NOT make me a selfish, unloving mother. I’m SO TIRED of reading this on message boards-yeah, yeah so stop reading them huh? It’s just that Kai was born(perfectly healthy) at 37 and a half weeks and I’ve been having contractions for weeks. I’m ready for the real thing.
What I’m really trying to say is that I submit to her needs. I have a feeling I’m going to learn a lot from this one.
The suns shining again, flowers are blooming, she will come soon. Meanwhile, I’m going to do my best to get lost in the magic of her.
Around the house
So many things. My boys left to spend 4 days in New Orleans for Mardi Gras on Saturday. I opted out due to my energy level < Mardi Gras energy level requirement. Seriously, as family friendly as their set-up is, it’s still so chaotic and a lot to handle even on the best of days; music, peoplepeoplepeople everywhere, parades, up late-up early, no quite time whatsoever. But I digress. I’m so happy they went and that Kai has these experiences. I also thoroughly enjoyed some me-time. My mom drove down Friday night and didn’t leave until Sunday morning. It was great to spend that time with her. I truly feel like there’s something about being pregnant that really bonds a lady to her mama. Then Sunday through Tuesday evening were just mine all mine.
And my big revelation: That having my house clean for a substantial amount of time is just not as important as the love I’ve got for my boys. I sure did miss them!
Around the web
I added yarn to a big wallet/small purse I’d thrifted a while back-planning the downsized/organized approach for new baby. Yeah, more nesting basically.
I made this diaper strap because loose diapers in my purse always drove me crazy with Kai.
(umm, more nesting..)
And I started reading this book about being “highly sensitive”. So far, so good.
I am officially impatient. I know, I know, she needs to stay in there a couple more weeks but this mama’s body can’t take much more. My back, my feet, my legs, heck even my arms are aching! I sit and rest a lot(hence the steady flow of blog posts lately) but there’s definitely a low level of anxiety/anticipation at all times. The shower has passed, clothes are organized by size, diapers and nursing pads in designated areas, her bed is even made. Which brings me to the infamous hospital bag. Here’s what I packed:
Most importantly, you want to feel comfortable and pretty too. I think it’s important to bring little things from home that will help with this. After you give birth, you feel a mess. Every little bit helps.
note: this is what works for me. i’ve seen list that mention bringing pillows from home or a nightgown, etc. do what it right for you. each list, and every woman’s bag will look different.